Self-confidence opens a lot of doors, from greater motivation to successful relationships. The big question is: how do you improve it?
Rarely will you find people who think they are confident in all areas of life. Genuinely, everyone struggles with self confidence in some aspects of their life. It’s possible to have high self-confidence in your expertise and still feel bad about yourself. It all comes down to the negative beliefs you have about your abilities.
Fortunately, raising your self-confidence is something you can work on. Here are three things that will help you feel better about yourself!
1. Stop the Comparisons
In this digital age, there’s no shortage of ways to make yourself feel bad. You must go on Instagram and admire everyone’s “perfect” life.
It’s natural to want to compare yourself to others. After all, that’s the basis of the social comparison theory, which was first introduced in 1954. The thing is, constant comparisons are more likely to hurt than help.
This 2018 study shows a clear link between envy and self-confidence. The more you compare yourself to others, the more envious you’ll feel. The more jealous you think, the lower your self-esteem will drop.
One way to break this cycle is to remember that life isn’t a competition. If you’re feeling envious of someone else, think of your blessings. Keep a gratitude journal to remind yourself of your successes and strengths.
2. Set Realistic Goals
Pursuing your goals is a valiant cause, but you shouldn’t do it blindly. The higher you set your goals, the more you’ll fail to realize them.
By comparison, setting realistic goals makes you more likely to achieve them. Doing so will also boost your confidence in your abilities. This process will also keep you focused and motivated to keep improving. As the adage says, you can’t eat an elephant in a day, but you can eventually eat it one bite at a time. If you have set a large goal, break it down into bite size pieces so that you can move towards your goal steadily. If you will make one effort or movement towards your goal everyday, you will achieve any goal you set for yourself. Celebrate each small accomplishment so that you are inspired to take the next step.
Failure is merely not trying. If you try, you never fail, you just learn a new lesson.
To set a realistic goal, think about what you want to achieve. Now, ask yourself what your odds are of attaining that. If the plan seems a bit lofty, dial it back to make it more realistic.
Often, setting realistic goals will involve research. For example, if your goal is to lose weight, experts recommend losing 1-2 pounds a week. Just knowing that will help you come up with realistic expectations.
3. Know When to Say No
Facing challenges and conquering them can always help to boost self confidence, however if you get in over your head, you may feel worse. Saying no to a project or activity that you know you are not capable of doing is probably the best thing to do when you are struggling with self confidence.
Setting boundaries when social pressure is caving in on you will help you protect yourself and keep in control of your thoughts, actions and feelings.
If the activity is something you would like to do, make it one of your goals and slowly start working towards it. Once you are more confident, you can try the activity and you will not feel as self conscious. Until then, hold your ground and say no.
This Is How to Boost Your Self Confidence
Boosting your self-confidence has a range of positive effects on your life. It makes you feel better, help you endure stress, and improves resilience. The above tips are a good start if you struggle with gaining confidence!